she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
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