God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
