Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
