I think scott just propositioned me for sex
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
