I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
