Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
My brain says no but my pants say off.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
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