I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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