This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
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