do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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