Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
