we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Randomize
