Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
You're completely useless in the revolution.
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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