no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
