Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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