Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
