I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
