already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
