I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Your cock deserves a montage
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
