Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
