it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
