In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
