lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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