Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Randomize
