Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
