why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
