So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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