$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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