You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
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