batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize
