There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
