Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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