what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Randomize
