I heard we made out
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
