I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
someone get that fucking seahorse.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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