the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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