Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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