I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
