My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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