hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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