Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
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