I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
