then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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