I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
