So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
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