my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
