Whod you bang
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Randomize
