Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
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