someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize
