ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
