Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Randomize
